You’re sitting on one end of the couch. Your significant other is sitting on the other end. It’s been a long day. You look at each other with care-worn faces. So, is this what your relationship is all about? Working hard, making a house your home, perhaps raising kids, making family and friends feel welcome, and then there you sit. Exhausted and lifeless. To one another, you both look really tired and uninteresting and unexciting. You both need to get out of your goldfish bowl and start looking at each other again in a new and pleasant way. A few simple steps can change what seems a dreary existence (it really isn’t, it’s just that neither of you realize this right now) into a life of continuing challenge and even fun.
Yes, fun. And interesting and fulfilling and exciting. We all want our relationships with our significant others to flourish so that the adjectives used in the few preceding sentences are needed to describe them. And include “Zest!” Well, give it half a chance and you’ll soon see that your lives are only dreary because you haven’t been communicating enough with each other. You haven’t connected in a way that was so important to you both when you were starting out together. The thing is, you’ve been too swamped with the wishes and desires of others while trying to hold true to your own as well. You both need to figure out a way to be alone together. So you can sit back and look at all you have accomplished together.
Head out for a walk. Walking is not only exercise but it’s time that you and your partner can use to start the day off right or use to relax in the evenings. A beautiful morning walk can get the juices flowing and boost your energy for the entire day. On the other hand, an evening walk or a stroll at sunset can relax and relieve stress so well that you will soon find it becomes an indispensable part of your evening routine; and just because you decide to walk in the mornings or in the afternoons doesn’t mean it has to stay that way. Walk whenever the mood strikes you and take advantage of the time together.
Walking with your significant other does so many things on so many different physical, mental, and even spiritual levels. You may walk briskly, punctuating the pace by tossing ideas at each other. You may walk slowly and speak in long and measured tones. There are no rules. The thing about walks is that they are something you two can share alone, without any hassles or planning, a time for reconnection. Yes, you built the house, raised the kids, took in family, entertained friends together. Now you need to put those things in perspective. You did those things because it pleased you both. Get away so you can stand back, see what goodness you have built, and figure out ways to improve on those things so that your time together continues to be fresh and exciting. And, your own porch light is always on.
The house is empty. Nothing is on the agenda for this weekend afternoon. The kids are off. Friends are busy with the peculiarities of their own lives. A steady rain, promised by the weather man to continue all day, is nourishing the trees and the plants of the dry city. You are reading the paper, your significant other is reading a book. The big gray cat is lounging on the ottoman, swishing its tail in slow circles. You and your significant other are together yet alone. It’s time you took opportunities such as this to be alone together.
Get out a deck of cards and hurl a challenge into the still air. The alarmed cat will jump off the ottoman and run away, leaving a good space for card playing. Play a fun game, play a thinking game. Before you know it, you will both be chattering at each other about all sorts of things, and not just the card game.
Taking a walk, playing a few hands of cards, these seem so mundane – so unexciting. Well, basically that’s true. But really, they’re not. They allow you time alone, they allow some time for your physical, mental and spiritual selves to commune again on a very basic level. That is so important to a relationship.
There are other activities you can share with no one else having to be there. A stroll through a museum. Time at an arcade. (Even if you think you’re too old for such nonsense.) Go to a fair and win a bear at a bean bag toss. Play a hand of cards. Take a walk. The simplest things are often the best things for young lovers of any age.
Sweep your partner off of their feet with amazing valentines gifts. All you need is a little imagination and the right attitude and finding the perfect romantic gifts for him will seem like a breeze.